Tales of floods and flattened peaks and of homes swept away or devalued in central Appalachia were laid out Tuesday by opponents to the Bush administration's plan to ease a buffer-zone regulation protecting streams from coal mining operations.

Testifying at an Interior Department hearing on the proposal, Mary Miller of Sylvester, West Virginia, said the value of her home had dropped from $144,000 to below $12,000. Residents in her coalfield town won economic damages last month suing a mining company over coal dust covering their homes, vehicles, and other property.

...

The department in January proposed easing a 1983 rule that set limits on coal mining near streams. Current policy says land within 100 feet of a stream cannot be disturbed by mining unless a company can prove it will not affect the water's quality and quantity.

The new rule would require coal operators to minimize only "to the extent possible" any damage to streams, fish, and wildlife by "using the best technology currently available."

...

Department officials have said the current policy is impossible to comply with during "mountaintop mining," which involves shearing off the tops of ridges to expose a coal seam. Dirt and rock are pushed below, often in stream beds, a practice known as valley fill.

It was the anecdote that politically seemed too good to be true. And it was. Treasury Secretary John Snow was set to say on Friday that "frivolous lawsuits" had caused the U.S. ladder industry to fold.

"There is not a single company left in the United States that makes ladders. The lawsuits got to be too much for the ladder industry," read comments Snow prepared for a conference sponsored by the Small Business Administration.

But when the department discovered there were some 11 producers selling $850 million worth of ladders in the United States, those words were left unspoken and deleted from a speech text posted later on the department's Web site.

Last Tuesday night, for the first time in thirty years, I found myself by one casual chance in a thousand, on hand in a small, narrow serving pantry of the Ambassador Hotel in Los Angeles, a place that I suppose will never be wiped out of my memory: a sinister alley, a Roman circus run amok, and a charnel house. It would be quite false to say, as I should truly like to say, that I'm sorry I was there.

...

There was suddenly a banging repetition, of a sound that - I don't know how to describe - not at all like shots, like somebody dropping a rack of trays. Half a dozen of us were startled enough to charge through the door, and it had just happened. It was a narrow lane he had come through for there were long steam tables and somebody'd stacked up against them these trellis fences with artificial leaves stuck on 'em, that they use to fence the dance band off from the floor.

The only light was the blue light of three fluorescent tubes slotted in the ceiling. But it was a howling jungle of cries and obscenities and flying limbs and two enormous men - Roosevelt Greer, the football player, and Rafer Johnson I guess, the Olympic champion, piling on to a pair of blue jeans.

There was a head on the floor, streaming blood and somebody put a Kennedy boater under it and the blood trickled down like chocolate sauce on an ice cake. There were flash lights by now and the button eyes of Ethel Kennedy turned to cinders. She was slapping a young man and he was saying "Listen lady, I'm hurt too" - and down on the greasy floor was a huddle of clothes and staring out of it the face of Bobby Kennedy, like the stone face of a child, lying on a cathedral tomb.

I had and have no idea of the time of all this, or even of the event itself, for when I pattered back into the creamy, green genteel dining room I heard somebody cry "Kennedy - shot" and heard a girl moan "No, no, not again" - and my companion was fingering a cigarette package like a paralytic.

A dark woman nearby suddenly bounded to a table and beat it, and howled like a wolf, "Stinking country, no, no, no, no" - and another woman attacked the shadow of the placid T.V. commentators, who'd not yet got the news.

And then a minute maybe, or an hour later or a day, the cops and the burly Johnson shot through the swinging doors with their bundle, of the black curly head and the jeans, and I recall the tight, small behind and the limp head and a face totally dazed.

Well, the next morning when I saw and heard the Pope in his gentle, faltering English, I still could not believe that he was talking about this squalid, appalling scene in a hotel pantry, that I'd been a part of and would always be a part of.

Bill O'Reilly, host of the most popular Fox News show, "The O'Reilly Factor," took to the airwaves on March 4, 2003, to ramp up the claim that not only did Iraq have WMD, but nuclear weapons. He stated definitively that "a load of weapons-grade plutonium has disappeared from Nigeria" and that the theft "should send a signal to all Americans that a nuclear device could be planted here." When he was challenged on his assertion, he insisted, "You cannot refute, and neither can anyone else, that we have plutonium missing in Nigeria, we have two rogue governments, North Korea and Iraq, who are certainly capable of aiding and abetting people who will plant an atomic device, a nuclear device in a city in this country."

O'Reilly was referring to a story that week about radioactive material missing in Nigeria. But it was not plutonium, as he claimed, or anything nearly as lethal as plutonium. It was a compound called Americium 241, wholly unsuitable for the creation of the imaginary "atomic device" O'Reilly referred to. The compound is commonly used for industrial purposes, as opposed to plutonium, which is used primarily for weapons and nuclear reactors. The compound, in fact, was misplaced by Vice President Cheney's old oil firm, Halliburton. (The Nigerian operation under Cheney has sparked an international bribery investigation by the Justice Department.)

So you shouldn't dismiss the new blues cover albums by Eric Clapton and Aerosmith simply because both acts are richer, whiter and scarier to look at than Dick Cheney...

Perry isn't the guitarist that Clapton is, but his picking has a slutty vocal quality that's perfect for Bo Diddley's Road Runner and Muddy Waters' I'm Ready. It also plays well off Tyler's singing, which increasingly sounds less human and more like a rogue trumpet. Tyler can still hit all the notes, often at the same time, and his explosive incomprehensibility on Big Joe Williams' Baby, Please Don't Go will leave you laughing — in a good way. It's unclear exactly what Tyler is feeling (though it might be in his pants) but he's definitely feeling something, and Honkin' on Bobo is a reminder that the blues don't need to be profound, they just need to be profoundly felt.

Pickering's critics say he has a record of racism. His detractors are primarily upset because he reduced the sentence of a white man who -- along with two other men -- burned a cross 10 years ago on the lawn of a biracial couple.

Two of the men pleaded guilty and avoided jail time, but the third was convicted of a hate crime after refusing a plea bargain, and the government proposed a 7 1/2-year sentence. Pickering said he reduced the sentence to 2 1/2 years because the higher sentence was grossly disproportionate to the penalties for the other two men.

Misconception: “Evolution is a theory about the origin of life.”

Response: Evolutionary theory deals mainly with how life changed after its origin. Science does try to investigate how life started (e.g., whether or not it happened near a deep-sea vent, which organic molecules came first, etc.), but these considerations are not the central focus of evolutionary theory. Regardless of how life started, afterwards it branched and diversified. Whether or not we understand how life began, we do understand a lot about what happened during the history of life—though there is still much to learn.

...

Misconception: “Evolution is ‘just’ a theory.”

Response: Scientific theories are explanations that are based on lines of evidence, enable valid predictions, and have been tested in many ways. In contrast, there is also a popular definition of theory—a “guess” or “hunch.” These conflicting definitions often cause unnecessary confusion about evolution.

Gribble was named Dade's Swimmer of the Year twice at Palmetto. During his freshman year at UM in 1980, he made the U.S. Olympic team, but never got a chance to compete when President Jimmy Carter pulled the United States out of the Moscow Games.

Rep. Earl Ehrhart (R-Powder Springs) acknowledged that he swore at Rep. Judy Manning (R-Marietta) in a House anteroom during a discussion over a House bill. Ehrhart claims Manning insulted him first. A tearful Manning would not discuss the nature of the argument, saying only that it was "unfortunate."

Genital piercings for women were banned by the Georgia House Wednesday as lawmakers considered a bill outlining punishments for female genital mutilation.

The bill would make such mutilation punishable by two to 20 years in prison. It makes no exception for people who give consent to have the procedure performed on their daughters out of religious or cultural custom.

An amendment adopted without objection added "piercing" to the list of things that may not be done to female genitals. Even adult women would not be allowed to get the procedure. The bill eventually passed 160-0, with no debate.

Amendment sponsor Rep. Bill Heath, R-Bremen, was slack-jawed when told after the vote that some adults seek the piercings.

"What? I've never seen such a thing," Heath said. "I, uh, I wouldn't approve of anyone doing it. I don't think that's an appropriate thing to be doing."

Phoenix police cited fitness guru Richard Simmons on suspicion of assault Wednesday night after he reportedly slapped an ultimate cage fighter across the face inside a Sky Harbor International Airport terminal.

Simmons, the outlandish 55-year-old known for his raucous exercise videos and boisterous personality, slapped the 6-foot-2, 250-pound athlete after the man reportedly made a derogatory remark about Simmons, Phoenix police Lt. Lowell Spalla said. "He made a comment, something to the effect of, 'Hey, look everybody, it's Richard Simmons. Why don't you drop your stuff and start dancing to the oldies?' " Spalla said. "Simmons approached him and said, 'You shouldn't make fun of people who have issues' and then he slapped him."

The unidentified man asked police to file charges against Simmons, who was cited and released before boarding a flight.

Whitney Houston checked out of a rehab clinic just five days after checking in March 15.

...

Addiction treatment rarely lasts five days. Most residential rehab facilities follow a 28-day program, says a spokesman for the Center for Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University. Even clinics that treat patients who rely on insurance to pay fees have a 10-day minimum stay.

Miller had much harsher words for his Senate colleague, who is preparing to challenge Bush in November. “The fact that he has this very liberal voting record will work negatively,” he said. Miller faulted Kerry for “trying to have it both ways on so many issues.”

MAX CLELAND: That's not the staff director's fault, it is the White House's fault. It's president Bush's fault. President Bush personally has nixed the effort of the 9-11 Commission to get all the documents in the White House, especially the Presidential daily briefs, which basically tell the Commission and the American people what the President knew and when he knew it in regards to the potential attack on 9-11 and the attack itself and the follow-up. He has personally nixed that information coming to 9-11. That means to me that all of the members of that commission will never get to see the real documents that I think are sensitive. The President, as I think John Kerry mentioned, had time to go to rodeo, but didn't have time to appear fully before the 9-11 commission.

Truth of the matter is, the White House has played cover-up and a slow walk to this game from the beginning. Now after sewing to the wind, they're reaping the whirl wind. Now what they've done is forced the Congress to extend the 9-11 Commission two more months, which kicks the final report in July right before the Democratic National Convention. That's not the Democrats' fault. That's not the 9-11 Commission's fault. That is the fault of the White House, to slow up this thing and it never even held any public hearing for six months.

Today's corrections: In yesterday's show, the quote attributed to John Kerry was actually a quote from Benito Mussonlini. Also, it turns out that the entire premise of our opinion segment was utterly unfounded. The O'Reilly Factor regrets the error and thanks alert viewer Al Franken for the tip.

CARTERSVILLE, Ga. -- Some Christian parents in Georgia want a bevy of books removed from their local schools' reading list.

Three parents with the group Crusaders for Christ told members of the Bartow County Board of Education that several books are too offensive for students to be reading.

The group's leader, the Rev. Dwight Holcomb, told board members, "You're going to answer to God Almighty for your decision."

Among the books the Crusaders for Christ want banned are "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinbeck, "The Martian Chronicles" by Ray Bradbury and "To Kill a Mockingbird" by Harper Lee.

County committees had deemed all of the books appropriate, but committee members will now consider whether to repeal their decision.

Clear Channel Entertainment suspended its popular morning show the Regular Guys on 96rock Friday after the show aired sexually explicit talk with a porn star.

Pat McDonnell, Clear Channel regional vice president, said a preliminary investigation indicates it was an accident, but the hosts Larry Wachs and Eric Von Haessler will remain off the air until a full investigation is complete. He provided no time frame on how long they will be suspended.

Ironically, the Regular Guys were trying to mock the current government campaign against indecency.

I know you lie when it's true
Jesus saves white trash, baby like you
It's too late for you to undo
Jesus saves white trash, baby like you

“A lot of people like to get out when their show’s still going well,” Stewart said. “This gives me the opportunity to beat this thing into the ground.”

1) Her husband, Jack Ryan, had a romantic affair with his Executive Secretary.
2) That he forced (her word) her to have sexual relations with him against her will, and
3) That he took her to various sex clubs, specifically in New York, New Orleans, and Paris and coerced her to have sex with him in front of other people.

Wingnut: It is not as if I have to check a box on my employment application as to whether I am a liberal or a conservative to get hired. If you can generate ratings and revenue, no cares what you look like, no one cares what you sound like, and they don't care what your politics are.

Randi: Michael, you don't generate either. You're number 18 in your marketplace and you're working. I'm a liberal working for Clear Channel and I had to be number 1 every single book.... Guys like you are copy cats, all you have done is got on the conservative gravy train.

HARTLAND, ME — A Hartland man was treated at a Pittsfield hospital after he nailed himself to a cross. The 23-year-old man apparently was trying to commit suicide Thursday evening in his living room, the Bangor Daily News reported.

...

Lt. Pierre Boucher said the man took two pieces of wood, nailed them together in the form of a cross and placed them on the floor. He attached a suicide sign to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross using a 14-penny nail and a hammer.

"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911," Boucher said.

It was unclear whether the man was seeking assistance for his injury or help in nailing down his other hand.

It seemed like Campbell was on track to seriously hurt his opponent. His overconfidence cost him as he dropped his hands and taunted Peden to hit him . Peden took the opportunity presented and dropped Campbell with a brutal left to the head that hit its mark perfectly and sent his opponent to the canvas on his back. Campbell struggled to make his way up as the referee counted. Campbell looked extremely dazed and referee Lou Moret made the right call stopping the contest at 2:27.

If George W. Bush wants to utilize images of 9/11 in his campaign commercials, so be it. I would also like to see the Democrats using images of 9/11 in their campaign ads: such as the image of the president reading a book, about a goat, to school children as the second plane crashed into World Trade Center. Or the image of the president going into hiding after the attacks. The Republicans are correct; Americans should focus on the leadership exhibited by the president on that horrific day.

The price of gas is a hot topic of conversation among delivery drivers like Armstrong Ratana, who works for Domino's Pizza near Emory University. Any increase at the pump comes out of his own pocket.

"It's really hurting the drivers," he said. "I thought winning the war in Iraq was going to give us cheaper gas. What happened?"

How many players are allowed to play at one time on any one team in a regulation game?
a. 2
b. 3
c. 4
d. 5


How many halves are in a college basketball game?
a. 1
b. 2
c. 3
d. 4


How many points does a 3-point field goal account for in a Basketball Game?
a. 1
b. 2
c. 3
d. 4


What is the name of the exam which all high school seniors in the State of Georgia must pass?
a. Eye Exam
b. How Do The Grits Taste Exam
c. Bug Control Exam
d. Georgia Exit Exam

What's with all this new hatred of The Juice?

All I hear these days is how much everyone hates The Juice. The Juice killed Jesus. Blah blah blah.

Look, OJ was acquited. Like it or not, our legal system says he is an innocent man, and we are obligated to respect that.

What? What's that? The Jews? Oh, never mind.

"Getting ready to lift now is Sergei Akmudov of the Soviet Union. His trainer has told me that he's taken anabolic steroids, Novocaine, Nyquil, Darvon and some sort of fish paralyzer. Also, I believe he's had a few cocktails within the last hour or so. All of this is, of course, perfectly legal at the All-Drug Olympics, in fact it's encouraged. Akmudov is going for a clean and jerk of over 1,500 pounds, which would triple the existing world record. That's an awful lot of weight and here he goes ... Oh! He pulled his arms off! He's pulled his arms off! That's gotta be disappointing to the big Russian!"

Soft drink giant Coca-Cola has admitted it is selling purified tap water in a bottle.

It says the source for its new Dasani bottled water is the mains supply at its factory in Kent.

...

Judith Snyder, brand PR manager for Dasani, confirmed "municipal" water supplies were used but said the source was "irrelevant" because it "doesn't affect the end result".

Bill Ball, pastor of Faith Baptist Church in the west Georgia town of Primrose, stood on capitol steps with two other men carrying a sign declaring, “I now pronounce you pervert and pervert.”